November 16th, 2009 by Antony
A lot of things have to do with the first impression and your communication skills certainly play a great role. If you want to make sure that you make a great first impression then you have to talk properly and communicate your ideas effectively. You are not going to impress many people if you are not talking properly. How can you make a great first impression? Here are some tips that you can keep in mind when trying to impress someone for the first time.
1. Say your words clearly. If you want to get your message across to someone then you have to make sure that you are being understood. If you eat your words or slur a lot then there is a high probability that the person you are talking to will not understand you. You must be able to pronounce words clearly when you talk to someone.
If you are having a hard time talking then you might want to try practicing by yourself. You might want to try listening to yourself while you speak. If you notice that your words are not pronounced correctly then practice the correct way of saying things.
2. Listen to what the other person is saying. Conversation is a two way road. Aside from speaking your mind out, you also listen to someone speak their mind too. If you do not comprehend what the other person is saying then how will you expect to respond properly?
How do you expect to have a decent conversation with someone else when you are not listening to what is being said? You might as well do a monologue on your own. If you want to have a meaningful and productive conversation with someone else then you must listen to what that person is telling you.
3. Clarify things. There are a lot of things that can be misinterpreted and misunderstood in the world today. If you want to make sure that you have a productive conversation with someone then you have to clarify things in your conversation. When you say that you are going to call a person, you should tell them when they will expect a call. When you hear that a person wants you to have dinner with them, ask the available dates. If you want a conversation to go somewhere then you have to pay attention to the details.
4. You must be sensitive to nonverbal cues. If you notice that the other person is scratching his or her head then maybe this person is confused on what you just said. You might want to clarify things a bit more. If the person is squinting then maybe he or she does not fully comprehend the thought that you just explained. These nonverbal cues are a very important aspect of conversation and you must be sensitive to them.
5. Ride the wave of the conversation. If you want to make a great first impression then you have to be sensitive to what is being talked about in the conversation and what clicks. If both of you are having fun talking about cars then don’t mention airplanes.
Ride the wave about cars and then move on to the airplanes when it is over. If both of you are having fun talking about intellectual things then do not try to crack a joke in the middle of nowhere. This may simply be interpreted as rude. You certainly do not want to get this impression for the very first time.
Making a great first impression is something that everybody wants. You definitely want to put your best foot forward every time you meet someone new. You have to pay attention to verbal and nonverbal signs when you talk to people. This is certainly something that will make your communication skills much better than the average person out there.
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Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters
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November 15th, 2009 by Antony
Success. How do I define success? I felt that there is no clear definition of success. Each individual has their own definition of success. For me, success is the ability to overcome adversity in achieving goals. Success is the ability to achieve and accomplish things which I once thought was impossible to achieve. Success is the ability to find my path to great happiness in life. Success is the ability to impact others lives positively.
Ultimately, success is determined by you. I remembered almost 3 years ago, I could barely walked normally and there were moments where I thought that I am not able to play the game I love so much, football(soccer). But I refused to give in. I know back then that I must at least try my best to play again. With determination and perseverance to overcome the challenges, I was able to play again. As I mentioned previously, I was able to play in other parts of the world and achieved more than I could ever imagined. I am thankful for that. I learn that if you set your mind to succeed, you will reach the success destination. Even if not fully achieved, partial success is not that bad either.
Through my experiences and observing successful people, I have come to a conclusion that achieving success is not an easy task. I mean come on, if success is achieved through lazing around, would you define that as a success? Successful people are action oriented individuals. Talk less, more action. They thrive on challenges. They are problem solver and in trying situations, they focus on the solutions. These people know that the path to success is not a walk in the park. They persevere a lot. Really a lot. They do not let others deter their focus in pursuit of their success.
In the journey to success, I realized that there will be moments where I feel like giving up, everything seems to be against you. But I have also realized that it is around this time that success is approaching me. I remembered telling myself, just for it, life is too Short and I have nothing to lose. In fact I can learn more from the experience.
Sometime I have noticed that the term lucky is associated with successful people. I agreed that luck and timing play a part but I strongly felt that success is achieved through perseverance and well thought plan.
As Amos Bronson Alcott, an American teacher and writer said, Success is sweet and sweeter if long delayed and gotten through many struggles and defeats.
Through wonderful medium of the internet and business opportunity such as home business, it has open doors for people around the world to have opportunities to share, learn and achieve success. For me, success path might never be a smooth path but it is a journey that I know I will treasure through this wonderful life.
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Mohamed Abdul Rauf Bin Mohamed Yusope runs his home based business and is a student at success university. For free internet home business and personal development tips, newsletter,visit: www.learn2berich.com
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November 14th, 2009 by Antony
In the game of life, enthusiasm can make the difference between winning or losing. Enthusiasm is contagious; it is an emotion that can be communicated more easily than words. It is a force that springs from person to person like an electrical spark. It is almost impossible to be exposed to enthusiasm for any length of time without acquiring some of it.
I learned this lesson when I was a teacher. We had an in-service meeting after school. The meeting was about teaching reading. I had no interest in teaching reading; I was a physical education teacher. I did not want to attend that meeting but it was mandatory. Needless to say, I attended.
I’ll never forget the presenter. His name was Tony Dibiasio and he was a teacher from Lakewood, Ohio. When he started talking about reading, a subject I had no interest in, almost immediately I was caught up because the speaker was totally caught up in his subject. He totally believed in the techniques of teaching reading and he loved it.
His enthusiasm energized the whole audience and everybody was listening to him. Not only did I learn about how to teach reading, which I used later in my career, but I saw the importance of enthusiasm and what it would do for a non-interested audience.
Almost all aspects of life requires some skill in persuading or motivating people, and there is no characteristic that will help you more than enthusiasm.
There’s the story of a saleman named Harry who broke every rule in selling that was ever written. But before the sales meetings, his sales manager would tell him, “Now Harry, I am going to teach the other salesman how to sell. I want you to sit in the back of the room and ignore everything I’m saying. You keep on making the same mistakes that you have been making.”
You see, Harry was his top salesman and it was no mystery to his sales manager why. He revealed, “I have never seen a salesman with more enthusiasm than Harry. He seems to have so much faith and conviction about the product, he cannot keep it bottled up. He just seems to bubble all the time. Harry isn’t selling, he’s on a crusade to convince everyone he contacts that they would be better off owning his product. You can’t stop a guy like that.”
How is enthusiasm acquired?
Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.”
Charles Schwab started out as a laborer and ended up as chairman of the board in the Bethlehem Steel Company has said, “A person can succeed at anything for which there is Enthusiasm.”
As a football coach, I was teaching a young player to tackle. I told him to throw his heart into the tackle and his body would follow.
If you’re going to be enthusiastic you must first want to be! If you’re mired in self pity, criticism and a lot of negative thinking about your job and your position in life, enthusiasm is not going to ascend from the heavens like a bolt of lightning and strike positive life into you.
Look at the word enthusiasm. Now look at the last four letters – iasm. “I am sold on myself.” I’m talking about the affirmation “Be the model yourself.” I’m talking about your self image. Liking yourself is a big part of enthusiasm.
Look at the letters again – iasm. “I am sold on my product.” You totally believe in what you are doing whether it be teaching, selling, homemaking, engineering, whatever it may be. Loving what you do is also a part of enthusiasm. Combine belief in what you’re doing and loving your product with liking yourself… Now you’re going to have an enthusiastic individual!
You don’t need to be loud or boisterous to emit enthusiasm. Just the quiet confidence that you have, the way you look people in the eye, the smile you have on your face, the way you shake hands, the way you take an order and even the way you walk can express enthusiasm and denote inner confidence. You can be very quiet and sincere and people will still pick up on your enthusiasm.
It’s easier than you think to become a natural wellspring of enthusiasm that energizes and motivates everyone you contact. Just focus on integrating these four basic principles into your daily life; Love what you do, believe in your product, like yourself and spend time with other enthusiastic people on a regular basis. When you do, your life and achievements will change dramatically, even within the first month! Start today.
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November 13th, 2009 by Antony
I’ve felt for a long time that the masses have the wrong approach when it comes to work and play. People generally play their time off around their work and many work themselves to a point where their efficiency, creativity and productivity are at an all time low, not to mention their health, before finally conceding that they needed to take some time off to recharge their batteries. This means that time off is often not fully optimised.
However, the more I studied successful people the more I realised that they had a very different approach. First of all successful people do what they love and because of this they are naturally more energetic. I was listening to a presentation by Dr John Demartini recently. He said that he has over 400 speaking engagements this year. Yes, he has more speaking engagements than there are days in a year but he absolutely loves what he does. Work to Dr Demartini, and others like him, is play.
Yet successful people still regularly schedule time off to relax, spend time with family and friends, experience new adventures, reflect and contemplate, etc. The thing is that they tend to schedule their work around their play.
Peter Thomson, the UK’s leading strategist on business and personal growth advises:
“Always book the ‘time off’ before you book the ‘time on’.”
Life is not just about hard work. Life is also meant to be enjoyed. What you gain through taking regular time off is immeasurable. Benefits include improved health and well being and also increased profitability.
With improved health and vitality you are better able to perform in your business and your efficiency increases. When you allow yourself to have regular breaks your thinking becomes clearer and you become a better strategist. This is far better for long term sustainability rather than being a tactician. It is the difference between working to a long term vision and plan and working on a day-to-day basis to put out fires. Time off work also allows your creativity to develop. But how does having more time off improve your bottom line, your profitability?
Have you ever noticed how your productivity increases just prior to going on holiday? There are things which have to be done and you pull out the stops in order to complete them. There are some individuals who confess to not having a holiday in years. Can you imagine that? It’s like being caught in a rut. Now, also imagine how your productivity would increase if you were to schedule regular breaks? Here’s how your working ethic would change. You would:
1. Be better organised,
2. Discover you had more energy for work,
3. Be more efficient in how you work,
4. Better prioritise your workload,
5. Work smarter instead of harder,
6. Get more done in less time, i.e. be more productive, and
7. Discover more creative ways to solve work problems.
You would also discover ways in which you could earn the same amount of money in a shorter space of time and you would develop streams of passive or residual income so that you were earning money even while at play.
So here’s my challenge to you. Get a year planner for 2008 and schedule the time that you will take off during the year. Then decide where you will go and what you will do during that time. Make it exciting. Then think about what you will need to have in place and the things you will need to do to make your plans a reality. Don’t worry that you don’t have all the resources – financial or otherwise – in place at this time. You’ll be amazed at how things can fall into place once you are clear about your goals.
You may also want to create a vision board that symbolises the places and people you will visit and the things you will do during your time off. Place your vision board in a prominent place to inspire you as you work.
Now you need to examine how you can improve your efficiency and productivity at work. Make a list of three to ten things you will implement over the next month and once you’ve successfully implemented those actions continue to add to the list. One excellent way to improve your efficiency and productivity is to make a list of everything that you do. From that list identify the things which you are ‘qualified’ to do, do well and that only you can do. Find a way to delegate or outsource everything else. This act alone will free up your time so that you can focus on what will increase your profit.
So book your time off before your work time and remember:
“Life is best enjoyed when time periods are evenly divided between labour, sleep, and recreation…all people should spend one-third of their time in recreation which is rebuilding, voluntary activity, never idleness.”
Brigham Young
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Nickolove Lovemore is a Life Coach, a Certified LifeSuccess Consultant and a Certified NLP Practitioner who will work with you to develop your personal success strategy for achieving your goals and your ideal life. Visit Achieve Life Success for special offers, gifts and news about upcoming events. Email Financial Independence for free book on how you can achieve financial freedom.
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November 12th, 2009 by Antony
The phrase ‘thinking up an idea’ is a common one. It is certainly fair to say that thinking, to most people, is the chief, if not the only factor that occurs to them when the job of producing an idea presents itself. How then, should one think? Have you ever thought about thinking? Surely a subject on which so much depends, deserves at least a very brief survey of some common pitfalls before we get down to actual idea production.
The highest level of thinking, of course, is performed by the creative thinker. He is the one who works over what enters his head. In creative thinking, prosaic facts, abstract questions, and oddities of information are transformed into fine literature, cures for dreadful diseases, and ideas which may change the way the world goes.
Most people do not even know that when they are confronted with a problem to solve, they have to do certain things in a certain order to solve it. Thinking in some respects resembles cooking. The thinker must follow a formula just as the cook follows a recipe.
There is a regular order in which the ingredients are added and prepared. Proper combinations are made, proper timing is considered. The dinner suffers if instead of soup, a delicious dessert is brought in before the roast. The thinker must produce not the right answer to the wrong question but to the right one.
To produce a specific idea for a definite purpose you must first state your problem in definite terms. All too often the wrong problem is tackled, and as a result, no matter how good the ideas devised to solve it, they are necessarily ineffective.
Before putting a lot of work into the production of an idea, you should decide whether the problem you have definitely stated is worth solving. Getting an idea requires time, effort, and perhaps money as well. If these assets could solve some other problem that would produce greater advantages for the same time, effort and money, the problem you are considering now should be reserved for another time. In other words, it is worthwhile considering not only whether you are working on the right problem, but also whether you are doing it at the most favorable time.
There are other things to safeguard you in your thinking against the faults of being either uninformed or misinformed. In this connection you should realize that there is a certain amount of information necessary to the solution of every idea problem.
You must ask yourself how many of the necessary facts you already possess; how many more are readily available, either in books or through interviews; how much more can be obtained by reasonable effort, and how much is simply not to be had at all through any feasible effort. In addition, you must know not only how much of the needed information you either have or can obtain, but also how dependable and accurate it is and whether it is in a form which you can use.
Such questions have a connection in determining whether a problem should be solved, because the time factor is affected by them. Far too often these simple considerations of finding out whether you have enough information, and whether it is dependable, are completely overlooked.
A little time and effort, and you will always be examining the right problem and exactly in the right way.
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November 11th, 2009 by Antony
There is surely no pain greater than heartbreak, so when you’ve lost a great love, how do you cope?
As someone who’s got the T-shirt on this, (twice divorced and bereaved twice in childhood), I’ve learned a lot of very useful tips when it comes to coping with heartbreak.
Here are a few of my top ones:
* In the early stages, accept your pain. If you’d broken your leg, you’d expect it to hurt for a while and you’d manage your life around it. It’s the same with emotional pain: to cope with heartbreak, let your heart be broken for a while. It will heal easier if you let nature take its course.
* Realise that healing from emotional pain is a rollercoaster ride – not a straight line. Whereas a physical injury will get steadily better day by day, emotional hurt doesn’t heal like that. You get a run of good days, then WHAM! A bad one hits. Expect these, and you’ll discover you can cope with the heartbreak much better.
* Don’t add guilt to anger. If you’ve been dumped or abandoned, it’s quite reasonable to expect to feel anger. (That doesn’t mean get physically or emotionally abusive though – that will land you in a lot of trouble – even jail!) Anger’s not a bad emotion – it’s better than despair.
* Don’t stay angry. Anger is a phase you’ll probably go through – it’s part of how to cope with the pain of heartbreak, but it isn’t the only answer! It takes a lot of energy to stay angry, and the only person who’ll hurt is you. Eventually, you’ll get bored and exhausted with the anger – so look for signs of that and welcome them as moving on!
* Finally, recall that in Chinese the word for “crisis” is also the same as the word for “opportunity.” Endings, however they come about, are also new beginnings. Each night, before going to sleep, let your mind tiptoe back through your day and find at least three good things that happened to you today. It maybe as simple as a child smiling at you, seeing a rainbow, hearing a cuckoo or some tune that you love on the radio. Write them down. If you compile these “magic moments” in a notebook that you keep by your bed, in a year you’ll have a thousand great memories! And as you keep reaching for these positives, you’ll find your life – including your love life – will improve, slowly at first, then faster and faster – as if by magic!
This is the best mechanism I know for how to cope with heartbreak! Remember, the greatest revenge is massive success – and when it comes to coping with heartbreak, that success is defined as your personal happiness.
Would you like to know exactly how to cope with heartbreak? If you’d like “counselling in a box” to help you cope with the pain of heartbreak and set you on the path to finding new love, get my program “How To Love Again When Your Heart’s Been Broken.”
The link is at the end of this article.
Cope with heartbreak.
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Trevor Emdon is a writer and workshop leader of many self help programs. His qualifications include Diploma in NLP and he is a graduate of Anthony Robbins’ Master University. “How To Love Again When Your Heart’s Been Broken” can be found at www.wizardofwisdom.com/heartmender
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November 10th, 2009 by Antony
There is an old saying that I grew up with which is “Adversity builds character.” Now there is a commercial on TV that says it isn’t the adversity that builds the character, it is how we deal with it that builds character. Either way you slice it, adversity not only builds character, but can lead to feelings of discouragement. Feeling discouraged at times is human nature, letting those feelings overcome you and rule your life is not healthy. There are things that you can do to over come those feelings of discouragement and beat the tough issues that are facing you.
It is important then to NOT let these negative feelings, this discouragement rule our everyday lives. We must take back control. We must be responsible for our lives and what is happening in them. YOU feel the way you do because YOU WANT to. Yes, that is right. You are feeling sad and discouraged and down trodden because right now, that is how you want to feel. Because if you didn’t you wouldn’t be. It is time for you to realize that you have the power and the control over your thoughts and emotions.
Yes, there are times when this is difficult. If life was easy what fun would it be? We must be faced with challenges, for they give us the opportunity to grow. Once you stop growing you have stopped living. Do you give up, or do you dust yourself off and try again.
I would like to think the latter is your answer. How many tries did it take for you to ride a bike with out training wheels? How long before you could not only climb up the tree, but get out without screaming for help. That one I had to learn fast, because my dad’s response was always, “You got up there now how are you getting down?”
So I ask you now, you fell down so how are you going to get back up? I am going to help you a little here by offering you a few steps you can follow so that once you get up from this fall, you may never fall again.
The first step is for you to become self aware. By this I mean that you need to know why you are feeling the way you are, the cause and how you can to stop it. I already told you the feelings of discouragement that you are battling right now you have because you want them. It is easier to give up and feel sorry for ourselves then to realize that we can change it. Acceptance is passive, requires less energy. You need to rebel and fight those feelings. Once you over come them or stop them, you will be amazed at the energy you have.
Now, step two is taking responsibility. Am I telling you that it is your fault that you failed? No. I am telling you that you are letting this setback rule the rest of your life. Everyday is a new day, filled with new opportunities to help you make life better. Are you going to throw all of those away because of what happened yesterday? Oh, wait, don’t try to tell me that it wasn’t only yesterday; your whole life has been one setback after another. That is because you believed that is what your life was supposed to be so you let it be.
I’d like you to look back at all of the good in your life, no matter how small it seems, and make a quick little list. Got it, now look out into the world, or up into the sky and say “Thank you, I am grateful for what I have.” I want you to say that five times a day after you go over the list of things that you have to be happy for.
After five days of doing this, I now want you to make a list of what you want. Be precise, don’t say “I want the promotion,” say exactly what you want. “I want to be the VP of the company.” Don’t say “I want to be free of debt,” instead say “I want to have enough money.” You can go as far as saying a dollar amount. Make sure that on this list you include that fact that “I am strong” and “I am in control.” Now on top of being grateful five times a day everyday, spend 15 minutes in the morning, before getting out of bed thinking about the list of things that you want.
If you follow these simple steps, you will overcome discouragement. You will not only feel encouraged, you will feel in charge and happy and satisfied with all in your life. The stress will be less, the joys will be more. You just need to follow those steps each day.
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Kevin Sinclair is the publisher and editor of My-Personal-Growth.com, a site that provides information and articles for self improvement and personal growth and development.
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November 9th, 2009 by Antony
Excuse me for the cliche title. However, I believe it’s fitting because these principles I feel really are the secrets to having massive success and having it fast.
Most experienced people in their area of expertise know of these principles. The first principle is: The best way to learn is to do it, screw up, and screw up fast. (The screwing up is optional but almost inevitable.)
Here’s the thing. I just had a little reminder of this principle recently. I love playing basketball and take it pretty seriously.
I had to referee 4 games with zero refereeing experience and zero refereeing training. I have no skills refereeing; I’m a player. Most players at almost any sport really don’t have a clue as to what’s going on. We just love to complain to the referee about a few calls and pretend we know what’s going on. We have no idea about how to run a game, just the basics about what is an illegal play.
I was freaking out about refereeing the games as I don’t even know how to run a game as a ref like substituting players on, how to call fouls, how to call time outs, and the most basic stuff! ha! I had to ref because the tournament organizer (my coach), made all his players ref to help fundraise an event for the next month. He ignored my plea to be released from the torture of having no experience. Here I was thrown in the deep end.
Fortunately, the first game wasn’t to bad. I had a girls game (and an experienced ref with me) and think the players mostly just respected what I did (nothing) because I’m 3 times their size.
I learned from this is if you have someone experienced by your side, they know what to expect and can guide you. This is the part where you get someone who has experience, and help them guide you during the unknown. It’s the view where your inexperience needs to be “made up” by someone else otherwise you’ll run into future problems.
New corporations that do great just about always employ a board of directors or fill other important positions with those who have experience. Get a mentor or just talk with those who have experience in areas you don’t. Let them guide you because you’ve never gone down that path while they likely have. This is a huge secret to succeeding fast.
As I said before, screw up and screw up fast. I sure did (it wasn’t that bad) as I missed a few obvious calls like one girl who should have gotten the charge as she was planted and was trampled over (silly ref 
). I learned for the next games which were more important. A later game I called my first charge which was great.
I stayed pretty quite that first game but made my first call (after having observed the other ref, what you exactly do. ha!) which was nerve raking. Like almost all fears, I had blown it out of proportion. I made the call and everyone just accepted it. What was I expecting? … to be yelled at of course.
Maybe you have a fear of being laughed at when writing a book (this was a big one for me), breaking the habitual pattern of 9-5, or jumping on the new diet. It’s likely the fear is attempting to protect you, but I’m betting you’re letting it build a 5 metre concrete wall around you such that you’re immobile.
The third game was a joke. I had to ref in front of 200+ students (it was a college game) who were standing one inch away from the sideline the entire game. The teams each had a side of the court to their own. Most of the game they were yelling abuse at each other. Why the heck was I reffing the biggest game of the night? I had no experience prior to the night and no training.
After doing that game, the following game was easy simply because it was contrasted against the third one and it just seemed easy.
You’re going to have those real tough moments when starting a diet, setting up a business, or trying to get a promotion, but get past them, and it just seems easy from then on in – even though it may not actually be that easy. For the future, you’ll have the pride and confidence knowing that you underwent those moments and they can fuel you to overcome your current problem.
There is no way I could have learned so fast if I hadn’t been thrown in the deep end. So… why not jump in? Come join me. It may be cold and deep but you can float and move around. You’ll live.
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Joshua Uebergang is a motivational communication skills expert. He teaches people both verbal and nonverbal communication skills. You can read more articles about communication and how to be successful in life by visiting his site and getting his free newsletter.
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November 7th, 2009 by Antony
If you lack success in earning money examine your core beliefs. Randy Gage, author of “Why You’re Dumb, Sick and Broke and How You Can be Smart, Healthy and Rich” believes that 97% of all people have one or more of the following as their core beliefs:
1. Money is bad
2. Rich people are evil
3. It’s spiritual or noble to be poor
What’s more, if you grew up in a modern society where you had access to television, films, and the like then these beliefs would have been programmed into you from an early age. Many parents are happy to let their children spend hours watching TV because it keeps them quiet. However, television can also do untold damage to children’s psyche.
I’m not saying that all TV is bad but the poor programmes appear to outweigh the positive programmes. Even seemingly innocent programmes such as cartoons often perpetuate the aforementioned beliefs. What’s more children are not discerning enough to truly understand the subliminal messaging within the programmes and so they absorb these messages, unquestionably, like sponges. As children grow into young people and then adults then these messages become crystallised into the core of their being. They form their core beliefs and influence everything they do.
Notice how, in the TV or movie world, bad things happen to people who are rich. Rich people are often portrayed as dysfunctional, unpleasant characters. Take JR Ewing of Dallas – a lovable rogue, but a rogue nonetheless.
Let’s take a look at Superman. Superman started out as a cartoon figure but with advent of television series and several movies this character truly does seem larger than life. Superman, like numerous other superheroes (Spiderman, Wonderwoman, Batman, Harry Potter) is an orphan. We are emotional creatures and so this immediately endears us to the character. He is brought up by the Kents, a hardworking couple who are doing okay but are certainly not wealthy by western standards.
“You have to work hard for money.”
Clarke Kent’s arch enemy is Lex Luther of Luther Corp – the rich guy who owns just about everything and who is rotten to the core. It is a common theme that the rich guys own big business and so the seeds of distrust are sewn against big businesses and those who run them.
Now there will always be a few rotten apples and so when corruption within such companies is exposed it re-affirms our negative beliefs about big companies and the people who run them. Yet, Robert Kiyosaki, author of “Rich Dad, Poor Dad”, will tell you that part of the formula for becoming rich is to own your business. Can you see how the very idea of owning a business would produce conflict in some individuals because of the belief that rich business owners are bad?
These are just a sample of the negative implications that one can draw from television programmes and movies whose primary target audience are children.
So children and young people watch these programs. What’s more, when they play they often enact scenes from these programs further engraining the negative messages.
When you weigh up the number of hours spent watching such programmes compared to the time spent doing positive activities you can see how it is sometimes so difficult to erase the negative programming. Often you may think you have effectively dealt with a specific negative or limiting belief when it shows up again in a different guise. This is why you have to:
(i) Choose effective techniques to counter your negative or limiting beliefs,
(ii) Have a range of techniques at your disposal, and
(iii) Develop personal development habits that you practise on a daily basis.
The negative subliminal messages are nearly always present in your environment. They exist like a background program. Once you recognise their sources then you can limit your exposure to them. However, it is also vital that you strengthen your mind so that:
(i) You are more aware of the negative subliminal messages as awareness will less their adverse impact, and
(ii) You build your immune system against these ‘viruses’ that threaten to corrupt your positive programming.
In addition to removing your negative programming and eliminating your negative core beliefs it’s vital that you replace those limiting core beliefs with new empowering beliefs. How about?
1. Money is good
2. Rich people are virtuous
3. It is a sin to be poor
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Nickolove Lovemore is a Life Coach, a Certified LifeSuccess Consultant and a Certified NLP Practitioner who works with individuals to help them successfully achieve their goals and achieve their full potential. Visit Achieve Life Success for special offers, gifts, other articles and news about upcoming teleseminars and other events. For free book and DVD send an email to Wealth Creation
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November 6th, 2009 by Antony
Improving social skill can be done by interacting with another person through verbal and nonverbal communication. This is carried out through speaking, body language, and listening to another person you are trying to communicate with.
Without social skills, people who find communication difficult may end up with a major social disorder later on. The causes of this are low self-esteem, lack of courage and a tendency to become a loner.
How to improve your social skill:
1. The best way of improving social skills is simply to put it in practice. By practicing, you will be able to be more comfortable later on in every social situation you can think of. When you become comfortable, you will just act naturally with other people. Being you is the starting point for effective interpersonal communication.
2. You can also study a technique like mirroring which involves practicing the way you smile, pose, lean, touch, and make eye contact – but this will take more courage compared to simple practicing. This may make you self conscious if you are not on the right track to practice it. When your mind is already set for self confidence, mirror practice is then recommended.
If you reached your goal of being comfortable with who you are, your self-consciousness will then dissolve. You will not even think about your self-image, how you may look, sound, and even react. You will just be thinking of the topics that are being discussed. With a high level of social skills, you will not even recognize the difference between talking with a friend and giving a speech to hundreds of listeners.
More tips on improving social skills:
With practice, you will soon be able to feel comfortable in every new type of interaction.
1. Try to think about social situations where you feel most comfortable with communicating, such as with old friends, family members or even playing a character in a role playing game.
2. Try to act natural when you communicate with people. Do not worry about smiling if you do not feel like smiling, instead of forcing yourself to smile within the situation. If you could simply bring that level of comfort to every social situation you are in, that will allow you to significantly improve your social skill.
3. Forming a social network is another big help. Try to be in places where you can communicate more. Find a group that shares your interests or even a whole community who are involved in those same areas of interest.
4. Try to create a self-help plan to bolster your weak areas, such as speaking too loudly or softly, or stuttering.
Communication means speaking and listening well. It cuts both ways – so if you can speak in front of a hundred people, but you cannot seem to listen when someone else is speaking, communication is incomplete. You have to keep in mind that listening is as important as speaking.
Try to be more attentive and listen to the person whom you are conversing with. The people whom you are talking with listened to you, so oblige them by being a good listener. Do this and you will be able to receive clearer messages which will lead to a better conversation.
Receiving clear messages will also allow conversations to last much longer, and produce healthier fruit.
When it comes to improving social skill, nothing is more effective than just being yourself. There are many pointers on improving social skills, but the solution lies only in your own hands. Practicing is the most effective technique for improving social skill.
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Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters
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